Question:
I just learned that a good friend of mine committed suicide. I don't even have time to mourn because of exams. What should I do? How am I supposed to feel?
Response 1:
(Sara Yoeun Rx2015)
I am so sorry you are having to deal with the loss of someone close to you by suicide. I urge you to speak with the school about your options for your exams as soon as possible. The type of grief and mourning after a suicide loss is unique and hard to understand without living through it yourself.
I know from experience that anger is very common, and may not rear itself until much later. Reach out to those who were close to the person you lost. Share memories. Talk about your feelings, reflect on your life, do what you need to do to mourn and grieve.
This book is helpful for suicide loss https://www.amazon.com/Gift-Second-Healing-Impact-Suicide/dp/0998074705
I am available for one-on-one conversation if you feel the need. Use the school's on campus counseling services to navigate the complicated emotions you may experience now or a few months from now.
Thinking of you in this heart breaking time. Sending strength and courage. Take care.
Response 2:
Hi there, I’m sorry for your loss. Losing someone isn’t easy. Especially in pharmacy school where the midterms/assessments are ongoing, it almost seems impossible to grieve. Similar to the post above, I would strongly encourage you to take the time to reach out and talk to mutual friends; speaking to others who also knew said person can be very powerful – especially when sharing experiences and memories. It’s important to address our emotional needs to grieve for someone that’s close to us, even if it means taking some time out of school to do so. I’m sorry that the timing is a little off, but I wish you all the strength, courage and resilience to recover from this event.
We reached out to Becky, our academic advisor, and she recommended the following resources that may be helpful:
School of Pharmacy’s Counselling and Student Success Services web page: https://uwaterloo.ca/pharmacy/counselling-and-student-success-services, specifically:
o Schedule an appointment with Dave Mackay at the School or another counsellor on main campus by calling 519-888-4567 ext. 32655
o Crisis help lines: Good to Talk 1-866-925-5454 and Here 24/7 1-844-437-3247
Some helpful outside resources:
o Waterloo Region Suicide Prevention Council’s Coping with Suicide Loss web page: https://wrspc.ca/coping-with-suicide-loss/
o CAMH (Centre for Addiction and Mental Health)’s Hope and Healing After Suicide: A practical guide for people who have lost someone to suicide in Ontario: https://www.camh.ca/-/media/files/guides-and-publications/hope-and-healing-en.pdf
o Public Health England’s National Suicide Prevention Alliance Help is at Hand: Support after someone may have died by suicide:https://www.nhs.uk/Livewell/Suicide/Documents/Help%20is%20at%20Hand.pdf
o The University of Texas at Austin’s Coping With Losing a Friend, Partner, Or Family Member to Suicide web page: https://cmhc.utexas.edu/bethatone/studentscopingsuicide.html
Do not hesitate to contact us if you have any other questions.